I randomly stumbled across this game and as a survivor of multiple attempts, thank you so much for publishing this.
thank you for finding words and art for things that are near impossible to express in an understandable way. I think you nailed it.
I cried a lot reading and I found pieces of myself in every character.
also thank you for making me feel seen. its hard to come by.
I'll go have a look around your other games because I am seriously impressed. hope you're doing better nowadays

thank you for creating this game, and publishing it despite it being so personal to you. 

i resonate with so much. the fan, the lover, the stranger, the self. i can see parts of me in all of them. this means so much to me, more than i can express. being a survivor of multiple attempts, i feel seen, i feel like i'm not completely alone in this storm that seems to never end, i feel normal in a world where these topics are considered the opposite.

i cried a lot. still crying, as i type this out. the comfort also made me cry. i just... thank you. thank you so much. 

i hope you are doing better, dev :) 

After reading the devlog, I became curious about this game. So, I immediately downloaded and played it since I relate a lot to the feelings expressed in the log. Needless to say, I am currently in the place of this game, too. I've been tired and want to quit everything, don't want to post anything "incorrect" or "bad" (fanart for instance in this case) and every time I begin to create I think about views, numbers, my account growing or shrinking.

Anyway, my point is (so I don't ramble too much), this game really hit hard. I've been wanting to give up for a long time now and I think this is exactly what I needed. I've never reached the point in the game, I wouldn't call myself a 'survivor' in this instance, but I struggle with the feeling every day.The part with 'motivation/desire' slowly fading in the form of a younger version really hit home.

I apologize I keep going, but as a fellow game dev and writer (maybe author, too, I don't know right now) thank you for this game. I may even keep replaying it. The 'just hit post' really struck me. It really is that easy ... Yet, still scary... The rejection, comments, everything or worse... Being ignored all together. But if this is how you felt writing it, and this is how I feel right now, then there really are people out there who will understand huh? People out there that, even though they don't know me or my face or 'me' (IRL), I hope my work can impact them too.

At the end of the day, it really is hard to create for myself too. Once I lost my mom, it grew harder. I write darker stories, ones that may scare people or not leave them "happy" in the end. It's a reason I struggle to become a novelist like I went to school for. I understand. If anything, I can't stand repeated happy endings. This game was raw, deep and real about how this feels. I feel more things and would ramble all day if I kept going. But they are all appreciation for this piece. Even though I am still hurting, this raised some of that pain off of me.

I hope I didn't say anything too much, my intention isn't any form of "trauma dumping" and I apologize if it's too much. I will edit it if requested (by the dev). Thank u, Meiri. Let's keep creating together and be lighthouses among the sea of those who feel like we do. Let's guide their ships into land and provide them a home. Even if it's a small, small island for a small amount of time. 

(Also, yes, I did cry. Even though I didn't think I would for something that reflected my mindset so well.)

Hi! I felt drawn to this game for reasons I still don't understand. I admit, I don't usually play games that unsettle me like this because they force me to look at myself. However, I played it anyway, and I cried like A LOT. UGLY CRYING A LOT. It felt so real for me as someone who, to put it vaguely, has struggled with mental health a lot over the past couple of years.

I actually ended up playing it over again a couple of days after the first play through just to appreciate it.

Genuinely, thank you for creating this for the thousands of survivors who will find this, and I thank you for being willing to be this vulnerable with strangers on the internet. I hope your mental health is doing significantly better, but even if not, you have a whole community of fans who all really appreciate this game by your side now! 

Please keep developing games like this; it means more than you know. Love you, dev!!!

as someone who doesnt usually get so moved by things like this, this game still genuinely brought my nihilistic ass to tears several times. 

reading this felt like holding up a mirror to all the murky feelings and thoughts i harbor, i had to take several long pauses before continuing. as a survivor myself i feelt really seen by your writing, ive been in most these positions myself before. youve revitalised my passion to create, im going to get out there and make shit again

i hope youre doing well now dev, take pride in your work!! it means a lot to more people than youd think <3 

Hi.

Not sure if this is a good place to do it, but I wanted to apologize for something.

I really liked the OST for this game and I couldn't find it online, so I decided to take the files from the game itself before knowing about the policy you had for this.

I know I didn't mean anything bad, but I want to apologize anyways. Sorry about that.

a really beautiful game and story. i'm glad it exists - although it made me sad (and ugly cry multiple times, a grown ass man i am) and i had to take some breaks. hope you're well, author & i'm excited to find out more about your projects =)

can't open on mac TT

This is an incredible game and there's still so much more I haven't gotten to. I just got to the post-game section and took a break to see what other things you've made. That's when I found out everything is interconnected. Where should I start? Do I go back to the very first games? Or can I pick up the story at overcomp? 

made me feel like shit and start so i quit (at the lover story) and then i came back 5 minutes later because i didn't want to leave it like that im glad i did

thank you for making it

I found this game because I was feeling empty despite showering consistently, brushing my teeth consistently, wearing clean clothes, going out with a loved one, getting good food, taking my antidepressant, going on a walk. I did everything right, but I still felt empty, so I looked for something that would help.

And this did.

Thank you so much.

i can't find the other author's name for the i don't believe you route in the save

no joke feels like a warm hug 

Esse jogo me fez pensar como sou ignorante com esse tipo de coisa, Que Jogo bom, irei mudar para uma pessoa mais atenciosa aparti de agora.

Obrigada pela tradução em português 🌷

i feel im being a bit stupid, but when we select "i don´t belive you", in the save/load option and asks his name, where do i find his name in the game to anwser the question?????, i only have been able to find it blurried out:(

i had to get up and pace around my room several times throughout this game. tysm for sharing this with us.

I thought all of this was very well-done and moving. I am very sorry that you have to specifically tell people to not be mean about something this personal. It also seems that in particular people are very rude about your art, so I wanted to say that I found it striking and thematically appropriate.

this game does some really interesting things with ren'py, going through it was definitely an experience. i love how non-linear it feels and how much you can interact with it (going through blog posts, finding hidden scenes in the save/load menu, the choice at the end with the eyes), even if the actual story is pretty much kinetic. i loved the general presentation and the art too, with the subtle animations and the largely black + white colour palette with the occasional pops of red and blue. it's clear a lot of thought went into the presentation, it's positively oozing with meaning without the game explicitly spelling the meanings out to you.

i won't talk about the subject matter (well it's fitting giving the themes of the game haha), but i did enjoy this a lot. the ending also felt surprisingly hopeful, which maybe felt antithetical to the author in the story wanting to make depressing stories to better reflect reality? but i did like the way it wraps up. it feels very unique, i don't think i've read a vn quite like it before. thank you very much for creating it!

This was incredible. I cant even really describe all of the ways this made me feel, other than the profound appreciation I have that you existed in the same time as I did, to write and code this piece of art for strangers on the internet like me to be able to experiance. 

The act of creation as self harm has been a concept I've struggled with for a long time as well, alongside the hatred of censorship practices and the dumbing down of media. This felt like a reflection of my own thoughts and struggles. Maybe why the fan's reaction resonated so strongly with me.

There are many things I want to create and publish but cannot bring myself to, for many reasons. Words don't flow. I don't finish drawings. I write short drabbles for my friends that half the time they don't read. This has made me want to post. To create again. I don't know how long the motivation will hold, but I hope you know that the stories you create really do make a difference. Thank you.

omw to try this out i'll tell yall what i think

edit:.....wow that was such a good way to spend an hour and 20 minutes of my life this game was truly a masterpiece. If the creator reads this, please keep making games, especially if they are this good. This game is a 9/10 in my opinion because, i don't fully understand some parts. like who am I? who was that blue eyed girl? yet even so i still love this game

Keep up the good work!

I have no idea as to how i'm supposed to convey my appreciation of the distinctly human writing (the typos kind of improve the immersion for me, weirdly enough), the premise and how it's toyed with to present the themes, the numerous symbolisms, the whole structure of the game's take on writing about negative themes (euphemism of the century but whatevs) and just writing in general and other stuff i won't delve into because it's about time i finish this damn sentence.

I guess i just did, huh? In short, this is awesome and thank you for making it, gosh darn why is writing comments so hard

(Spoiler-Free Review)

As I am typing this, tears are running down my face, across my cheeks. My heart feels so empty, yet so full at the same time. My emotions are at the height of their intensity. Anger. Sadness. Love. I am experiencing all of it.

What I thought was going to be a retrospective on the deceased author's writings and blog posts turned into an emotionally unsettling experience. But I don't mean this negatively. This feeling of being emotionally unsettled...was also in a way, somewhat comforting. Loss through death is a complex subject to discuss or even process, and yet this game demonstrated the perspectives of it beautifully through the lens of different people.

To be honest, it's difficult to keep my thoughts on this game to one boxed-in review, as I'm still feeling the emotions. That said, I would like to mention the strictly game-related aspects that I really enjoyed:

• The symbolism through colours. The mixture of reds and blues conflicting with one another. The black-and-white art. The use of colour really incites different emotions and gives players like me a visual understanding of what they represent.
• Eyes. Eyes eyes eyes eyes eyes. The artistic approach on the eyes were very simple, yet powerful. We use them to see (literally and figuratively) how others are doing. Not just seeing them physically, but through their mediums of expression. 
• The narrative branching style. The intention behind the way it was structured for this story...I could tell it had purpose. Although it was merely a glimpse into what I believe the experience/story behind it was, I felt like there was still significant weight in the choices that we were given.

One last thing: for the record, I was crying throughout this entire game. But the last scene really did it in for me. I truly hope more people play this so that they can see how much of a masterpiece it is. I commend you, Mei, and appreciate you sharing this experience with people like me. I will never be able to truly understand the story from your direct perspective, but even playing this game had me self-reflecting on the ways that I navigate death, loss, and mourning. I truly resonated with a lot of the conversations shown in this game, and it carries a very impactful message. Thank you for reminding us that games are more than just a place for fantasy worlds. They are vehicles for storytelling, even for the stories that are not "palatable." 

This is a game I will never forget. This is a game that I will forever cherish. This is a game that I will forever know as one of my favourite games to ever exist.

There's something I find really heartfelt about the use of color in this. Red being the pain, the hopelessness, the self-destruction. Blue being the drive to step forward, to keep going, to create. It being so distant while we're in the red. The blue starting to bleed back in...

What really made it click was seeing how purple was used in the end. We can never really get rid of the red, can we? Both sides are a part of us...

I hope you don't mind my musing, this hit some old wounds I haven't felt in a while... Thank you for making this, I'm so glad I finally played this

i'm about to download this but i've never been more of an idiot looking at a itch.io page, like am I the author? or just looking?